Thanh - The: Soya Bean Drink

Hello drinks fans!

Apologies for the lenghty delay in brew reviews!  The Drinks Master has been undergoing relocation of the Drinks Cave, which has diverted his time from beverage ingestion to moving box de-congestion.

However, in the relocation your hero took the opportunity to lighten the load by drinking rather than moving potential goods-in-transit.  The result is a short brew review of Thanh-The's green Soya Bean Drink.

mmmm Soylent Green

The Drinks Master has been intrigued by soya bean drinks for years, particularly those that were of a colour one would not usually associate with adjectives such as "fresh", "appealing" or "safe".  In that light, when perusing the wares of a local Asian supermarket when in dire need of refreshment lead to the acquisition of the aforementioned product.

Soya based softener

Thanh-The is a local producer  (relative to the Drinks Master) of what appears to be a Vietnamese treat. This particular offering was presented in delectable forest fresh fabric softer green, although other options of off-white and pink were available; perhaps for future consideration?  Thanh-The have taken the simple packaging structure of a plastic PET bottle, no frills labeling all easily accessed via a simple screw top.

Upon opening, Soya Bean Drink smelt curiously like tofu, with a faint sweet after tone.  The consistency of the product was akin to a thin milk, although no milk mustache was imparted from a brash swig from the bottle.  Noting the olfactory impact, SBD's first impact on the taste buds was unsurprisingly akin to liquefied tofu.

Now the Drinks Master understands that many folk don't like tofu, and admittedly it is an acquired taste.  Fortunately DM is quite impartial to a soya based hit, and so while the initial tofu blast was not gag worthy to the master, rookie gulpers may have otherwise spurted a soya spray across their hapless drinking partners.  

The question remains, was it a thirst quencher?  Unfortunately no, but it certainly weighed tenuously in the stomach immolating any short term appetite for food.   SBD could be well marketed as a natural appetite suppressant; are you paying attention Thanh-The?

Having sampled a variety of bean based drinks in his time, your hero was glad to have finally partaken of the mysterious green soya and removed it from the list of unknown delicacies of the liquid spectrum. However his desire to relive the experience was hardly voracious.  

If tofu is your game, and the thought of liquefying it with sugar cane sounds like your version of ambrosia, then you are in luck.  If however you are like the other 99% of the population... well you know what they say...

TV Food - Bird's Nest Beverage

Happy New Year to you drinks fans!

As the New Year opens so does the Drinks Master open a new beverage. Today’s tasty treat, Bird’s Nest Beverage, hails from tropical Thailand and is produced by those crazy guys at TV Food.

“Birds nest?!?” I hear you all cry. Yes drinks fans, bird’s nest has finally been matured, collected, distilled and bottled for all of your indulgent drinking pleasures. The Drinks Master must admit that this beverage has been staring at him from the Drinks Cave for some time now, and there has been much trepidation in partaking of the nest nectar. Still, there is a reason why the Drinks Master is so known – he’s not just a pretty face… oh and charming, witty, debonair, masculine, dashing, immaculate and, in all, humble.

BNB comes in a bulbous brown glass bottle neatly sealed with a crisp bronze foil wrapper. The label states that the brew is a “health drink” however one must surely question the veracity of that statement given the claimed content of the brew as follows:

• bird’s nest
• white fungus
• sugar and water

It is conceded that water has some health properties; however unless the Drinks Master has been lying under the proverbial rock for some time, the last time he checked, bird’s nest and white fungus weren’t generally widespread among the top branches of the pharmaceutical tree. It would seem that a colleague in drink agrees that TV Food have made somewhat fantastical claims regarding the nutritional properties of BNB, as noted in this review here.

Wrestling open the metal foil one is presented with a non-twist bottle top, which would obviously frustrate the casual or uninitiated drinker sans bottle opener or keen opening skills. This however may be standard practice in Thailand, as a recent associate returnee from the land of Thai demonstrated to the Drinks Master deftly half a dozen ways to open a bottle without an opener (or your teeth).

Perhaps in a masterstroke of marketing genius the label of the bottle runs to the very bottom, so that the funk inside is masked from a cursory inspection. However viewing the bottle from below reveals a solid layer of white strips, one might say reminiscent of small white worms – leftovers perhaps from the bird whose nest has been pilfered for brewing delights. While the bottle requires it to be shaken well, even a good shake does not stir the muck from the depths.

Unsealing the purported health tonic releases no rank odour or carbonated fizz. Closer olfactory inspection revealed hints of a rice aroma. Pouring from the bottle releases a thin gloop, not as thick as a Hong Da Ma special (refer earlier reviews) - more like a saliva like consistency. Out with the gloop flows the white worms which converts the brew into a pineapple like colour.

First slurp leads to a sweet rice / corn flavour, which is surprisingly not unpleasant. The review noted above suggested that the flavour was very sweet however the Drinks Master disagrees, as it pales in comparison to previously reviewed tonics (such as the Assam milk teas). Once they reach the mouth the “worms” tend to melt without any noticeable flavour or other sensory affront.

Subsequent quaffs remind the drinker that it is a ‘different’ brew. Due to the viscosity it is easily spilt or dribbled, upon which one looks like a snot nosed child. BNB could easily be used as a party gag in lieu of silly stream.

Certainly BNB is not noxious, but it is an acquired taste primarily due to the snot like nature of the liquid. If you are a connoisseur of fine refined brews this may not be your thing, but if you indulge in mucus munching or snot slurping then this is the brew for you.