TV Food - Bird's Nest Beverage

Happy New Year to you drinks fans!

As the New Year opens so does the Drinks Master open a new beverage. Today’s tasty treat, Bird’s Nest Beverage, hails from tropical Thailand and is produced by those crazy guys at TV Food.

“Birds nest?!?” I hear you all cry. Yes drinks fans, bird’s nest has finally been matured, collected, distilled and bottled for all of your indulgent drinking pleasures. The Drinks Master must admit that this beverage has been staring at him from the Drinks Cave for some time now, and there has been much trepidation in partaking of the nest nectar. Still, there is a reason why the Drinks Master is so known – he’s not just a pretty face… oh and charming, witty, debonair, masculine, dashing, immaculate and, in all, humble.

BNB comes in a bulbous brown glass bottle neatly sealed with a crisp bronze foil wrapper. The label states that the brew is a “health drink” however one must surely question the veracity of that statement given the claimed content of the brew as follows:

• bird’s nest
• white fungus
• sugar and water

It is conceded that water has some health properties; however unless the Drinks Master has been lying under the proverbial rock for some time, the last time he checked, bird’s nest and white fungus weren’t generally widespread among the top branches of the pharmaceutical tree. It would seem that a colleague in drink agrees that TV Food have made somewhat fantastical claims regarding the nutritional properties of BNB, as noted in this review here.

Wrestling open the metal foil one is presented with a non-twist bottle top, which would obviously frustrate the casual or uninitiated drinker sans bottle opener or keen opening skills. This however may be standard practice in Thailand, as a recent associate returnee from the land of Thai demonstrated to the Drinks Master deftly half a dozen ways to open a bottle without an opener (or your teeth).

Perhaps in a masterstroke of marketing genius the label of the bottle runs to the very bottom, so that the funk inside is masked from a cursory inspection. However viewing the bottle from below reveals a solid layer of white strips, one might say reminiscent of small white worms – leftovers perhaps from the bird whose nest has been pilfered for brewing delights. While the bottle requires it to be shaken well, even a good shake does not stir the muck from the depths.

Unsealing the purported health tonic releases no rank odour or carbonated fizz. Closer olfactory inspection revealed hints of a rice aroma. Pouring from the bottle releases a thin gloop, not as thick as a Hong Da Ma special (refer earlier reviews) - more like a saliva like consistency. Out with the gloop flows the white worms which converts the brew into a pineapple like colour.

First slurp leads to a sweet rice / corn flavour, which is surprisingly not unpleasant. The review noted above suggested that the flavour was very sweet however the Drinks Master disagrees, as it pales in comparison to previously reviewed tonics (such as the Assam milk teas). Once they reach the mouth the “worms” tend to melt without any noticeable flavour or other sensory affront.

Subsequent quaffs remind the drinker that it is a ‘different’ brew. Due to the viscosity it is easily spilt or dribbled, upon which one looks like a snot nosed child. BNB could easily be used as a party gag in lieu of silly stream.

Certainly BNB is not noxious, but it is an acquired taste primarily due to the snot like nature of the liquid. If you are a connoisseur of fine refined brews this may not be your thing, but if you indulge in mucus munching or snot slurping then this is the brew for you.